A Word on Depression
I’m feeling the need to address this today for some reason. This morning I wrote in my journal that today was a good, but normal morning. “I don’t feel particularly happy or sad… just ‘normal’, and after so many years of being depressed I have to re-learn what that feels like.”
Some of you know that I have suffered from depression my entire adult life. In my late 30s, though, things took a turn for the worse. Honestly, there was a period of time where 3 out of 4 weeks were spent in hopeless despair. I just couldn’t seem to pull myself out of it feeling weepy, tired, overwhelmed, confused, angry and spent.
I started seeing a therapist. At one point he told me, “You don’t have to accept the depression.” When he said it, I couldn’t see how it would ever go away.
Then I was diagnosed with hypothyroidism and the resulting medication literally changed my life: I went from three weeks of depression a month to perhaps one or two days…. I felt so good that I thought I could get off the depression medication….
Uh…no.
But guess what? I now happily and joyfully take any medication I need to keep my depression in check. I know what it feels like to feel good again, normal again, and if taking a few pills every day works, then I will do my part and take them. I also have been able to take other steps that have contributed to my “not accepting the despression.”
If anyone reading this blog is suffering, please, go to a doctor, therapist, WHATEVER to get the help you need…. You don’t need to accept it.
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The above “Adam & Eve” painting is several years old. I’m thinking of revisiting the theme this winter with a series of paintings.
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GLAD tp hear YOU are feeling better Carla! I’ve been there, done that! I had some lows back in October and November! whenever I didn’t post on my Blog! but my dear, dear Grandma Garnet died early November a week before my birthday and that was a lot of it! Depression runs thick in my genes so I’ve got to be extra careful! I haven’t had to take medication yet, knock on wood but I was almost ready back then! Phew! I want to start EXERCISING! that is a #1 way to get rid of it my doctor informed me, now if I would just DO it!!! Could you try and send me those valentines again in jpg format??? I just can’t open them in the other files! I don’t know why! My daughter said try jpg. if it’s not any trouble Carla!!! Third time might be the charm! I’m looking for those 16 images I bought from you today! In the depression and Christmas RUSH I don’t know what I did with them! Wish me good luck! Love your art! LOL Happy Wednesday!!! xo, Cinda
OY! I was just diagnosed with hypothyroidism. I haven’t started taking medication yet as my doc is still trying to decide the amount. I wasn’t depressed but rather cold all the time and I thought was just part of going through menopause–which apparently I’ve also completed by age 45.
LOVE LOVE LOVE the Valentines by the way! Thank you! I’m going to post the link on my blog.
Cheers to you!
i’m glad you’re feeling better carla. life is too short to spend most of it in despair. i’ve also dealt with depression since a teenager, lots of medications and therapy. it wasn’t until i had a specialist diagnose me with bi-polar early this year did i finally understand all the ups and downs. after several months, i’m finally on medications that are working – it’s such a blessing to feel good for days running and not just curl up in bed everyday. i’ve been on thyroid medication for 25 years too. i couldn’t live without it, literally.
three cheers for science and good doctors who care!
Thanks for this comforting post. I too have had issues with depression and medication in the past. And now I only have occasional bouts.
Oh yes..the vicious “I don’t need the meds” trap…then you go off…then you realize you need to be on and you have to wait for it to work. That has to be one of the most horrible lessons of Depression. Been there and it is noooo good.
So glad you are on the meds and feeling ‘normal’. And thank you for sharing!
your art is beautiful, and thanks for writing this post!
I am too scarred to go on medication. I was on it before and it made me numb.
I am glad that you leaped out of your depression though- because man- it is the horrible to suffer with.